How to Move in With New Roommates
- 1). Search gently for common ground. You and your roommates may share less obvious interests, such as vintage cartoons or coin collecting, but you won't reach that happy point of interest if you bombard them with 90 questions before they've even unpacked their toothbrushes. Let the relationship develop naturally.
- 2). Discuss rules and responsibilities shortly, but not immediately, after moving in together. Blindsiding your new roommates within 20 minutes of arrival with a color-coded chore wheel and a utilities bill split three-ways makes you seem controlling and inhospitable. Wait a few days and casually ask how they want to handle the utility bill. If you're moving in with roommates who already live together, you can simply ask they normally divide bills.
- 3). Say, "yes" to invitations. If your new roommates ask you to join them for a run or a night on the town, be polite and say yes. Making yourself available to social outings helps establish a relationship of trust and lets you learn about each other. Refusing such invitations in the beginning makes you look unfriendly and reclusive.
- 4). Be direct, but respectful. If you don't appreciate something, bring it up early in the relationship. Instead of wrestling your roommates to the floor and demanding they spit out every last crunchy oat cluster, calmly say, "Look, it's not a big deal, but I'm allergic to a lot of foods, so if you could not eat my cereal that would be great." Chances are, your roommates didn't even realize they were doing anything wrong or they didn't think it would bother you.
- 5). Abandon the images of cliché merriment depicted in television and movies. Sometimes people simply don't work well as friends; it's nobody's fault, and not all roommates are interested in forming close friendships. Don't be discouraged; just accept the situation for what it is and focus on living together peacefully.
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