If your loved one has dumped you, chances are you are looking at all kinds of different ideas about how to get your ex back.
Many of these involve playing some kind of games in order to make them jealous, or trick them into seeing you.
But remember, if you do succeed in getting back together with your ex, you may need to answer for playing these games.
Do you really want to restart your relationship with these kinds of tricks hanging over your head? Let's talk about a more mature and reasonable approach.
It may be that when you were together as a couple, you were constantly in touch with each other by phone or text.
Now that your ex has broken things off, you might not be hearing from them at all.
And while you definitely don't want to make a pest of yourself or appear to be a stalker, there is nothing wrong with calling your ex once in a while, just to stay in touch and keep the lines of communication open.
The best times to call would be on special days for your ex, like a birthday, graduation, or when they achieve something that is meaningful to them.
Even a thoughtful gift would be OK at such a time, but keep it very small and not too personal.
Think about emailing your ex now and then as well.
If you happen to have a mailing list of friends, add your ex to it.
If you don't have one, consider starting one.
You can send out items of mutual interest, personal updates and the like.
This is another good way of keeping in touch with your ex without appearing to be pursuing them too much.
Are you thinking about dating other people to make your ex jealous? Some people recommend this, but if you are really serious about getting back together with your ex, why do you want to bother with someone else? It could only get messy for everyone if you do end up reconciling.
The fact that you were involved with someone else during this time could come back to haunt you, especially if you were sleeping with them.
This would be a very risky game to play.
However, if your ex is dating you will have to deal with it.
After all, they did end your relationship and they are not "cheating" on you by dating other people now.
However, it is very likely that this is a "rebound" relationship, and it probably won't last long.
Rebounds rarely do.
In this case, take a look at the person your ex is seeing and see if you think their choice represents what might have been missing in the relationship with you.
For example, if you are a serious athlete and your ex is dating an artist or musician, you might think about how to show off your own creative side! Because you are apart from your ex now, it might be easier to look at them objectively.
Think about the things your ex does and says, and what it says about the kind of person they are.
Does it tell you anything about what need from a romantic relationship? Keep these thoughts in mind! Realize that because your ex broke up with you, he or she currently has most of the power in your relationship.
Don't give away even more of your power by telling your ex too much.
If you make big declarations of undying love or let them know how much you need them in your life, you will have very little say in how things unfold going forward.
You need to keep your own power in order to maintain a healthy dynamic between you, especially as you begin to approach reconciliation.
One very important thing to do while you are apart from your loved one is to continue working on yourself.
Keep up your physical appearance, and don't let yourself get sloppy.
Consider a new outfit or hairstyle if it makes you feel good about yourself.
Take up a new hobby or expand upon an existing one.
Take some courses in things that interest you and might broaden your horizons a bit.
Nothing is more attractive to a potential partner, even your ex, than someone who is obviously happy, healthy, and doing well, physically and mentally.
If it is meant to be, reconciliation with your ex will happen in time.
Let it happen naturally, with love and common sense.
That's a much better foundation for the future than head games could ever be.